(Setting: the breakfast table at my house as we’re polishing off the beautiful French toast my moms-in-law made for us. Having finished hers, the wife takes out her current knitting project–a fancy scarf knitted on the bias–to start a new row.)
THE WIFE– (to her mom) I think I figured out why I keep getting extra stitches in this…
ME– (interrupting) Have you been snitching?
THE WIFE– What?
ME– Have you been snitching? (beat) Cause snitches get stitches?
THE WIFE– You are a dork.